Under the influence

Whenever I find myself in a drunk and disorderly state at midday I tend to head for the sofa. Failing that I'll opt for the suitably serene public offering of a park bench. Never, I say never, would I chance propping up a lamp post in the middle of a busy thoroughfare. "Wibbly on feet spells likely defeat". Thats what my old man always said, and thats what I stand by, particularly in the case of an inebriated human versus a flurry of petrol powered mechanoids. You can't dodge cars when you're pissed dude. Especially when you're drowning in an abundance of tech fabric. It may well wick away the blood sweat and tears but it won't fend off the breaks. Smash, bang, wallop... ouch!